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Gay Throuples: Definition, Dynamics and Perspectives

What Is a Throuple? Definition, Dynamics, and LGBTQ+ Perspectives


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The word throuple might sound playful, but it describes a very real relationship structure that’s gaining visibility, especially within the LGBTQ+ community. So, what is a throuple?

The word throuple is used to describe a relationship where three people (regardless of gender) are connected, emotionally, romantically and sexually. It’s a committed, consensual triad where each member is equally involved in the relationship, unlike a love triangle or situations involving cheating. In essence, it’s like a couple, however with three partners.


Understanding the Throuple Relationship Model

A throuple (also called a triad) works on the same foundation as any healthy relationship: trust, communication, consent, and mutual respect. Each person shares a connection with the other two, and the relationship is navigated with shared values and agreed-upon boundaries.

Unlike some polyamorous relationships where one partner may date multiple people separately, a throuple is structured so that all three individuals are in a shared relationship together.

Throuple Meaning: LGBTQ+

Why Are Throuples Common in the LGBTQ+ Community?

Throuples are especially common in LGBTQ+ circles, and for good reason. The queer community has long challenged traditional, heteronormative definitions of love, sex, and family. For many LGBTQ+ individuals, non-traditional relationship models feel more authentic and freeing.

Some reasons throuples thrive in LGBTQ+ spaces include:

  • Freedom from monogamy norms
  • Flexibility in emotional and sexual expression
  • Rejection of rigid gender and relationship roles
  • Strong communication practices in queer relationships

Throuples often form chosen families that align with their personal values and identities.


Types of Throuples

There’s no one-size-fits-all version of a throuple. Here are two common types:

Closed Throuple

In a closed throuple, the three partners are exclusive with each other. No romantic or sexual involvement happens outside the triad.

Open Throuple

Open throuples allow partners to explore romantic or sexual connections outside the relationship, often with agreed-upon boundaries.


Throuple vs Polyamory: What’s the Difference?

While a throuple is a type of polyamorous relationship, not all poly relationships are throuples. Polyamory can include multiple partnerships with various levels of involvement, whereas a throuple is a more structured, triadic relationship with emotional connections shared among all three individuals.


Challenges Throuples May Face

Even with strong love and communication, throuples encounter unique challenges:

  • Legal limitations: Only two people can marry in most countries.
  • Social stigma: Some people don’t understand or accept throuples.
  • Jealousy and imbalance: Like any relationship, emotional management is essential.
  • Logistical complexities: From sleeping arrangements to holidays, everything involves three people.

That said, many throuples report deeper communication, shared support systems, and a strong sense of chosen family.


In most parts of the world, legal marriage is only allowed between two people, which makes things like taxes, healthcare decisions, and adoption more complicated. However, throuples can still create joint households, co-parent, and enter into shared legal agreements like power of attorney or cohabitation contracts.


Examples of Throuples in Real Life and Media

With growing representation, more throuples are sharing their stories online and in the media:

  • Gay male throuples on Instagram and TikTok are showing what family life can look like with three dads.
  • Shows like House Hunters and The Politician have featured or referenced throuples.
  • Celebrities like Nico Tortorella and partners have spoken openly about polyamory and triads.

Tips for a Healthy Throuple Relationship

If you're considering a throuple, here are some tips for success:

  • Communicate often and clearly
  • Set and respect boundaries
  • Prioritize each person’s emotional needs
  • Consider LGBTQ+ or poly-friendly therapy

Where to Learn More About Throuples and Polyamory

Want to dive deeper? These resources can help:


Conclusion: Love Comes in Threes

A throuple is a loving, consensual relationship between three people who choose to build a life together, emotionally, romantically, and often sexually. While it may challenge mainstream ideas of relationships, it offers depth, connection, and authenticity for those who embrace it. Especially in LGBTQ+ communities, where love takes many valid forms, throuples represent one more beautiful way to live and love.

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